The Importance of Expression for Your Soul with Artist Nadia Aldea

Nadia, it's so wonderful to meet you today. I know you're in Canada, you're a few hours behind me, so I'm glad we could have a time to connect and talk, talk about your art. Obsessed with your art, you've got so much going on, so thank you so much for joining me today.

Thank you for having me. I'm obviously super excited to be here and have this conversation with you today. I just love what you're doing with this podcast. I have to say I think it's wonderful. Can't say I listened to any podcasts nine years ago when I first started having kids. Maybe something like this would have been a little bit helpful. So I think it's great for any moms out there who are doing anything creative. So yeah, so to introduce myself Sonia Dejda Aldeia is my full name. I go by Nadia that's my short name easier to say, I'm an artist and author and I'm 36 years old. I am a mom to three young kids. I have a nine year old and a seven year old and five year old. He just so. Our youngest, the five year old, just started kindergarten, which is really exciting. I think any mom who has young kids understands the excitement of that. So I've had a lot more time to myself during the day, which has been great. I really enjoy my kids because I feel like I've learned a lot through them. I feel like I've actually had a lot of my own personal growth, a lot since I became a mom. What's the psyche of that? I have no idea, but I feel like having them and seeing them, how they perceive the world and how they look at me, really pushed me to grow as an individual. So that's the family side For me personally. I love reading. I love a good story, telling a good story, reading a good story, impactful stories that encourage a new perspective, new ideas. I'm very outside the box thinker. Sometimes that's a bit of a challenge because I feel like I'm a little stubborn and I try to push things and not quickly say quickly agreeable or quickly to say yes. I'm always kind of like, well, what's on the other side, though?

Honestly, I'm in the exact same way, so I completely understand.

I completely understand that I think it's a blessing and a curse. And again, I do see it with my kids, especially my daughter, who will push the boundary and question you. So I try to remember you know what that's a good skill to actually have like a good personality trait, especially as a woman. I feel like Talking about the art. Thank you so much. I love that you like it and did it?

Yes, tell me so. You're an amazing artist, so let's start out by talking about that. So tell me what inspired you to become an artist, and I especially love your style. So I really focus on, like my books right now. But a lot of people don't know that I'm an abstract artist. I just haven't painted in a long time. My husband always tells me Kelly, get back into painting. You know, make some more art. It's been like a few years since I really made a painting, like a big one. You know that I love. So that's like my heart. So talking to you today about that and seeing your art, it's like taking me back to my like cozy spot. You know. I mean I have a lot of cozy spots, but this is especially a cozy spot.

I feel like, like you just said, it's something that I've always kind of tapped into, like it's always been there, but I didn't realize how important it actually was to me until recently. And again, yeah, the first painting I ever made was like I think it was 2009. So that's quite a while ago and at the time it's very similar. So I actually recently visited it and I looked at it and I was just like, wow, like even then, I was painting this way. I was creating from this, like abstract, vibrant expressionism of like from the subconscious. The painting is very much from the inside. I remember making the painting because I just sat down, I turned on music. I'm self-taught. I have no, I mean, I've done like a few classes here and there, like workshops through the city or like nothing. You didn't go to like art school, wow, no, art school, no, no. Yeah, I remember creating the painting with music and just kind of like releasing, and that's how I do things now, even with the new arts that I'm creating. I mean, I feel it again because I'm self-taught. It's this world that you're diving into. You don't really. I don't really understand what my style was or understood for a long time, and the more I do it, the more reading I do the more research. I do. I start to understand, like okay, like this is a thing People do, this Like. I land somewhat in this box of abstract expressionism and that's what my artwork is. When you say what's your motivation, where do you get inspiration? I find, like my artwork, the inspiration for my artwork is like to look inside and just to be curious what's gonna come out, cause I feel like I have so much that needs to come out. While I'm doing that, in that process, somehow it's like a healing, calming, mending. It's this like beautiful process. At times when I have painted, I not fully to tears, but I sometimes tap into an emotion and it just like does that thing? You know, when you watch like a really sad movie and does that like quiver. Or you know you see something beautiful and it's like and it just like it taps into something here. That's where my art comes from. So when I pick up a if I'm doing paint or an acrylic or pastel or just even with the digital, I can pick up my digital pen and I'm like literally motivated because I'm thinking, oh my God, what's gonna come out Like I just I'm so curious. That's my motivation. I feel like there's a lot inside and the art. Lets me bring it out and just learn more about myself.

I kind of feel that as well. So I did go to art school and I remember my very first painting class. I like did some paintings and stuff before, but that's when I kind of really like started and I didn't have a style, you know, did whatever except like landscapes, like that wasn't my thing. They're beautiful but I wasn't a landscape person. So in my first painting class we had to do like the basics. We would do so much still life, you know, put vases and stuff, paint the still life, do self portraits, do a lot of like realism and I was like maybe I don't like painting because this is not bringing me any joy. It wasn't bad at it, I just it was like this isn't fun. And then I remember my painting professor. She was like, do you ever do abstract art? And I was like I like abstract. I don't think I've ever really painted it. She was like okay, and then I don't remember how she talked to me about it, but she showed me some like abstract artists and we just kind of discussed, you know, and the art teacher kind of like let your mind go, kind of for you thing and I got a huge canvas and I just started like painting, like to people that don't do this, it sounds weird Like you just paint how you feel, you know, just paint what's inside of your whatever you don't really know. Usually when I go into a painting I don't know what it's gonna look like. You probably really don't either. You kind of have some idea if you want to make a specific one. So then I was painting and I was like, oh this is it? I'm getting like so excited. This feels right, feels right, yeah, and I got that feeling and it was that. That was just it, like when you were describing it. I felt that too when I first started painting and I was like this is my, so glad you understand it. Spot. This is my life, this is what I, this is what just feels right.

I appreciate. That Makes me feel a little, you know, because you're right. I think for some people it might be like like what do you mean? But I think for for other artists, coming out with a plan and you know a pre sketch and you know pencil in and it's a whole. That's how they function, that's what makes them feel good.

Yeah, yeah.

And I completely respect that, because I'm like, oh my God, that gives me anxiety to like think, like I need to pencil in my, my plan. I'm just like no, no, that's not the way I actually recently it's the painting behind me. I don't know if you can. Whatever your craft is, I feel like a lot of times we look online to look for ideas or inspirations and then like, put your own spin on it, right. So for a while I was like you know, it's very common for artists to have like a self portrait, so like I need to do a self portrait. So then I start the self portrait and I'm doing the lines like what we just talked about like you know formal about it and, like you know, looking at a picture of myself and like trying to do this, like perfect nose and oh my Lord, and I just brought myself to like so much stress. And I just looked at it and I'm like what am I doing? Like you're being absurd, stop it, make a portrait. But your own version, yes. And then so I just erased it, I think, like not fully, but like left some parts and I just went off and Whatever came out and like it's like one of my most proud pieces. I will say now and I just love it. Like I look at it, I I love the story with it, I love that I Started penciling in and I tried to like put myself in that box and do it that way, because you feel like that's what others are Doing. So I should probably do that.

But then that little voice was just like hey hey, hey, once you really just have that confidence and yourself as an artist to be like no, this is what I paint, this is who I am, this is my style, it's it's like a wait taken off of you and it's just like it's so much fun.

Yeah, gross mindset it's really developing like accepting I don't. I don't think it's like a spot I'm at completely. I'm definitely Working towards every day of like Not having what's the word life paralysis, where you're so scared, you're so critical of yourself and that you stop yourself from doing anything. I recently heard of that and it just was like life changing. It was one of Bruny Brown. Like, oh my gosh, she like I'm telling you that book like was a pivotal change Because there were so many things that were relatable to me and I didn't realize that I was functioning that way. So, yeah, it's definitely me. Um, I always and now a lot of times, what I'll think is like, if I'm questioning what I'm doing with my art, or is this the right direction or is this good, now I just think, like, just do it, like just push yourself, put yourself out there because at the end of the day, like who's to decide if it's good or bad? It's not. I'm not putting it out there to be judged as good or bad. I'm putting it out there for myself, to Challenge myself, and I'm challenging myself by putting myself out there.

And when you're an abstract artist, you have to have thick skin in general, because no matter what you do, there's going to be people out there. It's, they just don't understand it.

Yes, and I feel like, like whatever we're talking about, books are, I feel like there's always something for somebody. So you know like I'm not gonna like certain pieces of art or Appreciate them for what they are because it's just maybe not my style or doesn't speak to me right, but this is not bad. So I'm trying to put that perspective to mind. We'll see how it goes. Paintings always been there. Poetry actually is the the furthest back from 11 year old I was writing poems. Again, at the time I didn't realize the, I was just doing it, you know, and I feel like as a child you really need somebody there to be like, to like nurture a skill. Yeah, so you know, looking back, I understand now that it, that was always there, and from there again into adult life, acrylics started there and then photography started to do photography. So again, creatively, it's always been there. But I feel like until recently I really didn't understand it and I'm 36 years old, like that's just crazy to me.

No, I get it. I'm 35 next month and I'm like I love my 30s. Yeah, like, I'm like finding myself Totally.

I totally relate to that and I feel like saying that now, what do you think? Saying that now, what do you think, say, 10 years at 45, 46? I feel like it'll be almost an elevated version of what we're saying now.

Dude, we're gonna be thriving and we're gonna be like solid just the best, so excited, and by the time we die, we're older. It's been a really great run, like the 80s. I love my 80s. Yeah, so photography. Then you know I had to port myself.

So there was you know there's a phase, I think For everybody that goes where you, just like I, basically need to pay the bills and support myself how I can. So I worked a job and it nearly killed my soul. It was like a nine to five office government job and paid well, you know, for I think I was like 20 or 21 years old, like again. Even then it was just like a nine to five office government job and I was like 20 or 21 years old, like again. Even then it was just. I realized I needed something where I can create and and use what's inside of me out. I started photography business with a friend. We did that out of my house. We had a little like out of my kitchen, I'm sorry, out of my like dining room. Yeah, thanks for watching.

Yeah, we're anything. We did that kind of stuff yeah.

No studio, no photo studio at home. Now, and then, after kids, again everything just kind of changes. I gave them myself completely and fully. And I say that not in the sense of I'm not going to work and give my kids everything. I in the sense of I feel like it was a really challenging time and again, looking back, I didn't realize how challenging it actually was. So I had to give them what I had and put everything else aside. So at that time I had started my first book, which is Dear Baby Stories, and I got almost like a little obsessive about this book, because when I was pregnant with my first, you start to understand like there's so many books, so many stories, everyone has so many perspectives and opinions and this is wrong, this is right. And talking to other women and experiencing my own experience and I thought like holy man, like there's such a deep dive with this and there's such a wide range of pregnancy experiences and you know the happiest moments, to the deepest and rawest moment, you know. So that's where the motivation came from, where I thought, man, like I, if I feel like this, I can't imagine, like I don't want anyone else to feel so alone in their own struggles when they're pregnant. So the inspiration was from that. So I started to talk to women and started a blog and started collecting stories from them. Just I would send like a questionnaire and they would fill it out and it could be at whatever stage they're at. So at the end I had this collection of stories from I think it's about like 40 women from like first semester to the end, and it's just snippets right. And then some of the photographs some they would send me their photographs through there from abroad. But yeah, that time, like when I say like I had to learn to put it down because I just ran this book through, at this point I had my first. My first and my second are 22 months apart, so when I had this book I had my first he's still in diapers and then newborn and I'm just ramming this book through. When I say ramming through, I'm saying like I'm like no, I need to publish it this year, like it has to come out this year, I have to finish it this year. And so I was just like go, go, go, go, go go. And I remember like working on the book, on the computer, receiving stories, and like I'm literally dripping breast milk, like you know, when you just weeks oh yeah, I'm just dripping breast milk because probably more hormones. And I'm emotional reading these women's stories. I'm pregnant, be lost and just like I'll never forget the moment, I'm just sitting on my desk like crying and my husband's like what are you doing? Like just put this down and pick it up again later and again talking about being stubborn. I was like no, that's not happening. Like no, I need to get these out. Like people need to read these. You know, I feel like one thing I want to talk about today is definitely that I feel like that's a great lesson, reflecting back. I think back. I'm proud of the book, I love the book, I think it's beautiful, but I could have given it a little bit more, but it could have just been a little bit later, like it did not need to be that exact month, like you know. Yeah, so I'm really learning the process and the practice of starting something that you're really passionate about and I think you could maybe relate to this but the practice of like putting it down, coming back again to it later and that's what you need to do, yeah, right, yeah, I imagine a lot of creatives will relate to it where you just get like a little obsessive about a project. Oh yes, and it's hard to stop.

And then you feel like you can't stop because you think you either won't pick it back up or you just have that sense of urgency where you really have to be done now, because I love like just immediate gratification and if I have an idea in my head I want to do it, then I want to complete the whole thing, get it done, get it out now. You know it's like now or never. Yes, sometimes we'll just run ourselves ragged and we can't do it all right then, like you did. But it's so hard to put things down, it's so hard to continue it later. We think, no, it has to be now, because we just get obsessed. You literally get obsessed with it.

It's an obsessive thing, yeah, and I think that obsession also. I think for sure it's a reward. I feel like you can't be a successful person in nearly anything unless you have a little bit of healthy obsession about what you're doing.

Healthy healthy keyword.

Whatever that means, I don't know what to ask me. But I feel like realizing that you can put it down and pick it back up later will. Actually I'm speaking for myself I feel like once I learn that, no, I can just do this for five minutes and put it back down and no, I can do this for a day or a week and put it back down and pick it up in a week, like once I learned that process, I was actually able to do more when before I thought, well, I can't, you know, like hammer this out, I can't just get this done, so I won't even bother, like I won't even pick it up. You know, it was this huge intimidation because, like it's created in my mind, I'm not doing it, because I thought, okay, well, I can't do it at 100% right now, so I won't even bother. So that's been a huge lesson and, for sure, something I wanted to talk about today, because I feel like, especially if you're a first time mom man, give yourself a break. Like, oh, I know we all want to do everything and all of it and take care of everybody, and but if you're a creative person, that's not gonna go away. If you have ideas, that's not gonna go away. Note them down, take voice notes in notes on your phone. Just write everything down and just trust yourself that I can go to it later and maybe right now we need to take a pause or a break. Maybe you don't, maybe it's a week break or a day break, or maybe you just don't work on it right now. If you're having a hard time, cause I feel like right now I don't know if you would agree with this, but I feel like in our society for especially like North America, we're very like it's great, it's like women can do it all. Like, yeah, working moms, they also own a business and they own three businesses and they bake homemade cookies every day and their house is spotless. Like it's this like unattainable. I think it's unattainable and unrealistic goal. You can do those things, but not all at the same time. Absolutely not completely. So I think it's great that we challenge and like support women to be these superheroes. I think that's great. But I think what I think is really important is to tell women you know what, if you feel like you suck right now at something, that's okay. If you feel tired and you have a new boring and you're sleep deprived and you don't feel your best, that's normal. You know like we have a really good impression. Someone said a test when we had our first and it was like guys, you're in the weeds, you're in the thick of it, like, just get through it, you're in the swamp. Like get out and when you get out, get your superhero boots on and then continue doing what you're doing. I recently have been dedicating days or like feening my days, so each day has a theme, so my days would be like a man. Tuesdays is like education, so catching up on, like the thousand classes. I sign up for workshops and they're lingering in the background. Wednesday for content creation, thursday for creating whatever. Like. I used to do the same over COVID, because everyone was home in in Alberta. They had shut everything down, so everyone was home all at the same time and it was just like at some point I was like I'm going to lose my mind. So I started to. I created a habit of waking up at five, which, like I am not an early bird, or I wasn't, but now I am. But that was the only time that I could get like some quiet and a long time and like a peace of mind. Before, you know, the chaos of family started. So for sure, I love the theming and like, yes, you can do it all, but not every day.

I think it was like Amy Porterfield that had a book recently and she's talked about I believe she called it Tiger Time, where it's she likes to pick certain hours of the week it can be just like three days and she said this this is what I'm going to work on this time. This is the only thing I'm going to focus on. Everything's out of mind. I'm going to get this done, so I'm going to attack it on these days and you know, no matter how the day goes, whatever it is, this is what I'm doing on this time. It's kind of goes along with what you were saying about, like your themed days. What theme days. I love a good routine, so I think I might get that from you, Nadia.

Routine is so good, especially as a family. I read this recently Again. I'm like I'm deeply motivated by words and I think that's reflecting back to the 11 year old self writing poems and also learning English at the same time. So I feel like I can see a word or read a sentence and like get like an immense amount of motivation or like healing or inspiration. For some reason this last week, hummingbird was like really like ringing in my head like the word hummingbird. So I started reading about hummingbirds and googling about hummingbirds and then I came across this like beautiful story and I was like, oh my gosh, like this is too relevant to what I wanted to talk about today. So I wanted to include it today. If it's OK with you, I would love that. Please do OK. So let me try to not mess this up. Give it the credit it deserves. So the story is told by a woman's right advocate from Kenya, wangari Mathai, and the story goes like this the story of a hummingbird is about this huge forest consumed by a fire. All the animals in the forest came out. They are transfixed. As they watch the forest burning, they feel very overwhelmed, very powerless, except this little hummingbird. It says I'm going to do something about the fire. So it flies to the nearest stream and takes a drop of water. It puts it on the fire and goes up and down, up and down, up and down as fast as it can. In the meantime, all the other animals, much bigger, like the elephants with a big trunk that could bring much more water, are standing there helpless. They are saying to the hummingbird what do you think you can do? You're too little. This fire is too big. Your wings are too little. Your beak is so small you can only bring a small drop of water at a time. But as they continue to discourage it, the hummingbird turns to them without wasting any time. It tells them I'm doing the best I can.

What a short but powerful story.

I love it because I feel like the elephant is external, but the elephant is also internal. So it's your critic, but also your external critics, but also your internal critics. You're doing the best you can. We all have that inner critic who's like judging and criticizing rather than doing. And then there's, I think, what you just said about even social media, of letting the outside world influence you and your own decision. So just the powerful statement of I'm doing the best I can.